Simone Elkeles - [Perfect Chemistry 03] Page 14

  “Hey,” Alex says. “Before you rip on white people, you might want to remember that your nephew is half white.”

  “Not the half that counts,” Carlos says proudly. “Listen, I’m an American and fight for this country, but that don’t mean I ignore my Mexican heritage like it’s somethin’ to be ashamed of.”

  “I’m not ashamed of it,” I say. “I don’t know Spanish or walk around waving a Mexican flag. I’m not going to fake it, when I don’t know much about it.”

  “It’s not too late to learn,” Carlos says.

  “Luis, are you going to introduce me to your friend?” his mother cuts in.

  Luis hesitates, so I step forward. “I’m Nikki,” I say with a smile.

  “Nikki Cruz,” Alex says. “Dr. Cruz’s daughter.”

  “Ah, I remember you.” She tilts her head, deep in thought. “Weren’t you at Alex’s wedding?” I silently pray she doesn’t mention that I kneed Luis’s nuts on the dance floor. That’s an incident I’d rather not dredge up right now.

  Carlos isn’t going to let this one slip by. He perks up. “Oh, yeah! Nikki, weren’t you the one who kicked Luis in the—”

  “Nikki goes to Fairfield,” Luis explains. “We’re in chemistry class together.”

  So now everyone is silent, waiting for me to talk. I turn to Luis and mumble quietly, “Can we talk?”

  “Yeah. Follow me.” I follow him through the kitchen and out the back door. “All right,” he says. “Talk.”

  I clear my throat and look up at the sky, knowing that Luis wants to go up there one day. Will he pursue his dreams, or has he changed his plans? “I was thinking about what you said in chemistry today. You know, the part about me judging you before I had all the facts. Well, after thinking about it … you were right.”

  He shrugs. “It doesn’t really matter.”

  “It does to me,” I say.

  “Why? You’ve made up your mind about me.” He gives a short laugh. “Everyone has.”

  “Tell me right now you’re not dealing drugs and I’ll believe you. Look in my eyes and tell me the truth.”

  He looks me straight in my eyes. “I’m not a dealer,” he says, his gaze not faltering one bit. “The drugs weren’t mine. I’m not Marco, so stop puttin’ both of us in the same category.”

  “You’re friends with him.”

  “I’m also friends with Derek. Listen, I don’t know what the hell happened between you and Marco. To be honest I don’t really want to know, ’cause if I did I’d probably want to kick the shit outta him.”

  “I don’t need you to protect me.”

  “What if I want to?” I watch as he looks up at the sky and stares at the stars. “Damn, Nik, you have no clue what crazy thoughts have been runnin’ through my head since we were on Derek’s boat, and then after hookin’ up Saturday night … You want to ignore what happened, but I can’t.”

  “The truth is, I can’t, either.” I swallow the lump forming in my throat. “I have to know if you’re in the LB, because if you are I can’t do this.”

  “Look at me,” he says. When I do he sighs. “I’m not a gangbanger, Nik.”

  “You were right to call me out. I wanted to think the worst about you, because if I did I could ignore the connection I feel when we’re together. It’s like I get you, and you get me, and then Saturday night when we were alone in the pool house—”

  “You said it was fun.”

  “I told you it was fun just to throw you off. Hunter once told me most guys can screw a girl they love just as easily as they can have a one-night stand. Marco was the last guy I dated, and he practically destroyed my heart and soul and everything in between. It was more than fun Saturday night, Luis. I need to know if you think we can make it work.”

  “Wow. The way my week has been goin’, that’s the last thing I expected to hear.” Luis runs a hand through his hair. I can sense the stress radiating off him. “My life is so fuckin’ complicated right now.”

  “Sorry,” I say. “I don’t mean to complicate things more.” I focus on the ground because I don’t want to see his face when he tells me that I’m delusional.

  “It’s not your fault.” He takes a deep breath, then slowly lets it out. “Nik, I gotta be honest. I don’t know if it’s a good idea to get involved with me right now.”

  “I get it,” I say. “You don’t have to explain.” He hadn’t tried to hide the fact he was a player from the second I met him. I was stupid to think getting closer to him and feeling a connection meant I’d suddenly changed him.

  “No, you don’t get it.” The sides of his lips turn up in a small smile. My breath hitches when he reaches out and slides his hand to the back of my neck and urges me to look at him. “I don’t want to be with anyone else, mi chava. I want you to be my girlfriend.”

  “Really?”

  “Yeah, really.”

  His words soothe my increasing doubts. “I don’t want to be with anyone else either,” I say.

  I haven’t wanted to let anyone get close to me, but that was before Luis came back into my life. Maybe this push-pull thing is us trying to figure out where we stand. Times have changed, I’ve changed, and I’m ready to put the past behind me.

  A moment passes and I feel a sense of peace cover me like a blanket. I hope he doesn’t see tears threatening to fall from my eyes.

  “Come here,” he says, pulling me close. “You’re shaking.”

  I close my eyes and a tear falls down my cheek. Luis has managed to slice right through my invisible protective armor and I feel so vulnerable. “I’m scared.”

  “Me too.” He holds me tighter, then kisses the top of my head.

  It feels so good to be held again by him. I bury my head in his chest, soaking up the warmth of his embrace. “Promise me you’ll always be honest with me, Luis.”

  “I promise.”

  27

  Luis

  The second lie I just told my new girlfriend is that I’d be honest with her. The first is that I’m not in the LB. If she knew I have a task to do for the Latino Blood, and I’m ordered to pack heat to prove my allegiance, I’d lose her. I understand that makes me a selfish bastard, but I don’t want to give up the chance at having Nikki be a part of my life.

  The back door opens. It’s Brittany, holding Paco in her arms. The second she sees us, she gasps. “Oops, sorry,” she says, backing up. “I didn’t mean to interrupt. Paco was looking for you, Luis, and your mom said you were outside. I didn’t know you were with someone.” She squints in confusion as recognition sets in. “Nikki Cruz, is that you?”

  “Yeah,” Nikki says, stepping away from me.

  “Oh. Wow, okay. I didn’t know you and Luis were, um, friends.”

  “We’re kinda more than that,” I tell my sister-in-law.

  “What’s going on? Are you guys, like, dating?”

  I drape an arm around Nikki, because it feels right and I want her close. She looks up at me, and I swear I can stare into her expressive dark brown eyes forever. “Yeah, we’re datin’,” I say without looking away from my girl. “Right, mi chava?”

  Our eyes are still locked on each other as Nikki smiles up at me and nods.

  “Does your mom know?” Brittany asks.

  “Not yet,” I tell her.

  Brittany laughs. “I think she’s got a pretty good idea. I caught her peeking out the kitchen window at least a dozen times since I came in. I had no clue you were out here with a girl … which completely explains why she was snooping. Mamá Fuentes protects her boys like a mother hen. I’m sure I won’t be any different when my son starts to discover girls. You remember that, Paco.”

  “Weese!” Paco yells, and squirms to get out of his mom’s grasp.

  “Paco, Tío Luis is busy,” she tells him. “He can’t play with you right now.”

  “It’s okay,” Nikki says, tearing her gaze away. “I have to go home anyway.”

  As soon as Brittany lets him down, Paco runs over to me.

&n
bsp; “How’s my little taquito?” I ask, picking him up and giving him a high five. “Shouldn’t you be asleep by now?”

  “Yes, he should,” Brittany chimes in, exasperated. “My son likes to be up all night and sleep all day … just like his father.” She places a hand over her growing stomach. “This one keeps me up all night, too. God help me.”

  “He’s a Fuentes,” I tell her proudly. “Right, Paco? You’re gonna have a little brother to boss around soon?”

  He nods.

  Brittany doesn’t. “Hopefully this one’s a girl. The male Fuenteses in this family are exhausting me. I don’t know how your mom survived living with three of you boys under one roof.”

  “Never a dull moment.” I faintly hear Carlos laughing. “It’s still not dull.”

  Alex calls Brittany back to the house, leaving me holding Paco.

  “Remember me?” Nikki asks, tickling my nephew’s stomach. “I’m Nikki.”

  “Ki-ki!” Paco yells. “Ki-ki-ki-ki. Ki-ki-ki-ki.” He bobs his head from side to side as if he’s singing a song.

  “We’re workin’ on his verbal skills,” I tell her.

  She gently smoothes a hand over Paco’s hair. “He’s perfect.”

  “So are you.” I lean in to kiss her, and for an instant an image of us repeating this moment in the future flashes across my mind … me, Nikki, and a child of our own.

  Nikki says, “I really have to go. We have school tomorrow, you know.”

  “I don’t want you to go.”

  “I know that you made the soccer team. I could watch your practice after school. We can hang out after.”

  “I’ve got to do something after practice.” A little task Chuy gave me that Nikki doesn’t need to know about. “But I’ll meet you later on.”

  “Okay,” she says, nodding. I can’t tell if she’s skeptical or not.

  We walk back in the house. Everyone is, unfortunately, still here. And, unfortunately, all eyes are on us.

  “I’m gonna walk Nikki to her car,” I announce to my family. I hand Paco to my brother.

  “Bye,” Nikki says, smiling shyly as she gives a nervous, general wave to everyone in the room. She walks up to mi'amá. “It was really nice seeing you again, Mrs. Fuentes.”

  “Thank you,” mi'amá responds politely. “Give my regards to your parents.”

  Regards to her parents? Suddenly mi'amá has turned into a mild-mannered socialite. Is she putting on an act for Officer Reyes? Whatever it is, I’m grateful.

  Nikki and I walk to her car parked out front. She leans against her car door before opening it. “Hey,” she says, then bites down on her bottom lip nervously.

  “Hey.”

  “You know that’s our routine, right?” she says. “You always say ‘Hey’ to me, and I say ‘Hey’ back. Or I say ‘Hey’ to you, and you say it back to me.”

  I smile. She would pay attention to something like that. I look down at those sweet lips I’m dying to taste again. “Hey,” I whisper as I bend down to kiss her.

  “Hey,” she whispers softly against my lips. She puts a hand on my chest. “Um, before we go ahead and make out … I think you should know that your family is watching us.”

  I glance back at the house. The lights are suddenly off, and I can make out the shadows of my family spying through the front window.

  “This is embarrassin’,” I mumble.

  “Call me later,” she says as she opens her car door.

  “Wait, aren’t we gonna kiss?” Seriously, now that I have a girlfriend, I’m gonna reap the benefits. Hell, the way my week has been going I figure being liplocked with her will keep me sane.

  She gives me a peck. “There.”

  “My cousin Elena’s stupid kisses are better than that, Nik. Come on, mi chava, throw me a bone here.”

  “I told you, we have an audience,” she says.

  I shrug. “I don’t care. Let’s give ’em somethin’ worth watchin’. My back is facin’ them, so they won’t see much.”

  She wraps her arms around my neck.

  I moan, loving the feeling of her body leaning against mine.

  It’s dark and quiet outside with only the streetlights giving off a yellow glow. Nikki knows how to get me fired up with a mere touch of her lips, and she uses that to her advantage. Her soft lips brush against mine, over and over. We start making out. Good thing my back is hiding our hot embrace.

  A car driving by honks repeatedly and stops beside her car, ruining the moment. “Gettin’ lucky, Fuentes?” a familiar voice yells out the window.

  It’s Marco.

  Nikki freezes, then buries her face in my chest in an attempt to hide her identity. It’s no use, though, because her car is a dead giveaway. My hands are braced against the car, shielding her even though I know it’s useless.

  “What’s up, Delgado?” I ask.

  He sticks his head out the window. “Obviously not as much as you and Nikki. Just a tip: she likes it when you lick her behind her ear.”

  “Thanks for the advice, man, but I think I can figure it out on my own,” I tell him. “Now get the fuck out of here.”

  Marco’s laugh lingers as he screeches away and disappears down the block.

  “Is he gone?” she asks, her voice muffled because she’s still got her head buried in my chest.

  “Yeah. Don’t worry. I’ll tell Marco to lay off.” I tip her chin up so I can get lost in her soulful eyes again. “My goal is to make you forget you ever dated him.”

  I lean down to kiss her again, but she pulls back. “I just, you know, need to say something before I leave. I don’t want to be worrying about it all night.”

  “Hit me with it.”

  “I won’t have sex with you,” she blurts out.

  Her words slam into my libido like a bucket of water on a flame full of testosterone. I think my dick just twitched in protest. “Like, ever?” I ask.

  “I just don’t want our relationship to be about sex and nothing else,” she says. “If we remove the sex expectation right now, it’ll be better.”

  Better for who?

  “I don’t want us to be all about sex, either, Nik, but I got to be honest … I was hopin’ it’d be part of it at some point.”

  She glances to her left and right, as if she wants to make sure nobody else can hear our conversation. “I just can’t. Too many complications, you know.”

  No, I don’t know. Do I even want to know? Shit. Is this about Marco? Or is this all about me?

  “I’ll understand if the no sex thing is a deal-breaker for you,” she says shyly.

  I’m not gonna lie. Just lookin’ at Nikki makes me horny, but it’s more than that. I like her. A lot. Enough to want to call her my girlfriend. I like just sitting with her and talking. The rest will come when she’s ready.

  “All right,” I tell her. “I’m cool with the no sex rule. But, uh, can we keep the option open to talk about it in the future? You know, just in case you change your mind.”

  “Yeah,” she says, lightly kissing me on the lips. “But don’t hold your breath that I will. We can do other things, though.”

  I raise my eyebrows, interested. “Like what?”

  “I’ll show you later.” She covers her mouth when a smile crosses her face. “I can’t talk about this when your mother is watching. I’ll see you tomorrow.”

  She gets in her car and pulls away just as mi'amá opens our front door. “Is there something you need to tell me?” she asks before I step in the house and face the rest of the family.

  “Yeah. I have a girlfriend.”

  “Don’t you think a girlfriend will complicate your life?”

  “Sí, Mamá. It will complicate my life.” But not in the same way she thinks. The Latino Blood is a black cloud over my head. I wish finding out what Chuy is up to didn’t include me getting caught up in the Blood. But it has. “It’ll all work out.”

  “College is most important,” she says. “More important than girls. Don’t let anything sidetra
ck you from your goals, Luis. You’ll regret it the rest of your life.”

  Right now my goal is to get past tomorrow after soccer practice, when I’ll be going into Evanston. It’s my first errand for Chuy and another way to prove that I’m willing to take risks for the Blood. I’d be lying if I didn’t admit a part of me was looking forward to the challenge.

  28

  Nikki

  In the morning, I wake up and immediately turn my phone on, hoping to have a text from Luis. I get butterflies in my stomach just wondering if he might have been thinking about me when he woke up this morning.

  A text pops up on the screen. It’s from Luis. I can’t help but grin when I read his perfectly thought-out message.

  Luis: Hey

  The message was sent twenty minutes ago. I quickly type the only appropriate response and press SEND.

  Me: Hey

  I rush to the bathroom, but bring my phone with me just in case he texts me back. While I’m brushing my teeth, I hear the chime on my phone. Another text. I hurry to finish brushing, then pick up my phone.

  Luis: u ok?

  Me: About what?

  Luis: Us. Me.

  Me: yeah. Why?

  Luis: just checking.

  At school, Luis and I sit on the floor in front of my locker before the bell rings.

  “I didn’t do my math homework last night,” I tell him as I pull out the sheet Mr. Gasper gave our class. “After I got home I couldn’t concentrate. I hardly understand it anyway. My brain doesn’t compute calculus. I don’t even know why we have to learn it. It’s not like I’m going to use it in real life.”

  “Depends what you do for a livin’.” Luis slides the sheet onto his lap and studies it. “Come on, we have ten minutes before the bell rings. I’ll help you finish it.”

  I try hard to focus on anything else but him. I move my hand over his and draw invisible circles on the back of his hand with my fingers.

  “You’re distractin’ me,” he says.

  “I know.”

  He laughs, then pulls his hand away. “Don’t you want credit for the homework, mi chava?”

  I kiss him. “Yeah, but I’d rather just hang out with you.”